


Speak Low

by Elennare



Category: Yogscast "High Rollers" D&D Campaign
Genre: Gen, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, at least Quill thinks it's one-sided, he doesn't know how Lucius feels so neither do we
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-01 17:10:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20261605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elennare/pseuds/Elennare
Summary: Newly returned to the living, Quill has some questions.





	Speak Low

**Author's Note:**

> Set during Episode 39 (uses dialogue from it), spoilers through that episode. Title comes from Much Ado About Nothing (‘Speak low if you speak love’). For the "heart" challenge at [](https://fan-flashworks.dreamwidth.org/profile)[**fan_flashworks**](https://fan-flashworks.dreamwidth.org/). Inspired by [this wonderful tumblr post](https://mr-deblob.tumblr.com/post/186122349794/also-i-am-choosing-to-interpret-that-moment-of) from mr-deblob which I have been thinking about for days... There were some _very_ interesting RP choices in that scene, from Tom bringing up the ritual in the first place to Kim and Katie deciding that's what Nova and Aila would remember and think to tell him about!

Quill followed the priestess of Siaska into the side chapel, still feeling half dazed. He had died, he had actually died, and now he was alive again, alive and with his sight more than restored thanks to a new eye from H’Esper himself… it was all too much to take in. And Sentry was back! Sentry was alive too! He’d last seen her laid on the altar in Kellara’s temple, after they had… asked her questions… wait, would they have asked him questions too? But Lightseer Eris was speaking now, and he had to pay attention to her - especially when she brought up Starbane, and he had to be very careful what he said. Even with his care, he suspected she might have guessed more than he said, which was worrisome. But he couldn’t see any way around it… To say anything more would risk making her even more suspicious. At least there was no denying he was a chosen of H’Esper, and if H’Esper was being secretive perhaps it would make sense to her that his chosen was too.

As he walked back to his friends after, though, that memory of the ritual started running through his mind again, overtaking his other worries. Would they have questioned him? Skaldi would have offered, surely; and the fact that they had brought him here, where he could be returned to his old body, instead of taking him to the Shepherd, suggested they might have. What else would they have asked, though? He couldn’t help remembering Lucius’s questions to Sentry… Lucius who had been oddly hanging back when Quill came to consciousness… Oh no, what had they asked? What had he said? Would his - ghost? memories? he really should have asked Skaldi more about the spell - would whatever was answering have known about his feelings for Lucius, about these strange confusing emotions he barely understood himself? Would it have spoken about something Quill would give so much to keep hidden?

For a second, Quill almost considered using his newly gifted eye to see what had happened. But he wasn’t entirely confident it would work, and surely he would have more important uses for it… No, he’d have to try and ask the others, as subtly as he could manage. Maybe he could ask Sentry privately? He could trust her, he always could, to keep his secret if he were to reveal it to her, to be understanding, but… she probably hadn’t been restored yet when they spoke to him, they must have done it as soon as they could. And even if she had been there, he could hardly pull her aside and ignore all the others, right after they’d brought him back… He wanted so much to talk to them all. To talk to Lucius… That was both enticing and terrifying.

Lucius was still standing towards the back of the group as he returned, and Quill’s heart flinched. Had he said something? Was Lucius avoiding him? He looked away, towards the others, suddenly afraid to meet Lucius’s eyes. Closest to Quill, Aila was trying to keep a goblin under control - how had they picked up a goblin, of all creatures? Still, Quill was happy to seize the distraction, to ask about the Howling Gale and the goblin; about Sentry’s shining new armour; about Tiangong and the fire genasi who apparently knew Nova. At least none of them seemed to be acting particularly odd around him - well, until his death came up, at least, but that was understandable. But still, Lucius was uncharacteristically quiet… he couldn’t let it go any longer, he had to know. No matter how bad it was, it would be better to know than to be imagining a thousand different things, each worse than the last.

“Lucius?” he said, steeling himself to look straight at the high elf for the first time; his heart giving the familiar jump it always did around Lucius, as if it had wings of its own and would like to take flight. And then a second, unfamiliar one, as he took in his friend’s appearance. Lucius looked… terrible, Quill didn’t have any other words for it.

Lucius smiled at him - that was good, right? But it was… strange somehow, not his usual beaming smile at all. “It’s really good to see you again, Birdie,” he said quietly, and stepped forward to hug Quill.

Startled, Quill put his one wing awkwardly around him, returning the hug as best as he could while also focussing on not showing how flustered he felt (thank the gods, aarakocra couldn’t be seen to be blushing). And focussing on Lucius… his friend looked even worse up close, haggard, eyes red and shadowed, worse than he had even after the airship crash. The only point of comparison Quill could think of was that first night in Myrskyr, right after the Abbey and Sentry and Starbane, but even then Lucius hadn’t looked as bad as this. Something was wrong, very wrong, and it probably wasn’t anything stupid Quill might have said while he was dead. He probably hadn’t said anything at all. Surely Lucius wouldn’t still be calling him that daft nickname that Quill secretly loved, wouldn’t be hugging him like this, if Quill had said anything to make him upset or uncomfortable. No, probably not… but now he’d thought of it, he had to be sure.

“Did… emm…” he began, then lost his train of thought for a moment as Lucius released him and stepped back again. “Did… you know with Sentry, we asked her questions? Did you do that with me?”

Aila immediately confirmed they had, but Sentry just looked baffled. So he’d been right, she hadn’t been around for that… Damn. He didn’t feel confident in asking Aila privately, or Nova, and Lucius was out of the question for obvious reasons. He’d have to try and find out now.

“What sort of questions did you ask? Did you ask my favourite colour, because I’m pretty sure I... ” Please let them have asked his favourite colour even though they’d had that conversation right before he died, Quill thought. It was better than so many alternatives.

Aila frowned. “I’m pretty sure we did…” spinning around to face Lucius, she demanded, “did you ask his favourite colour?”

Nova was shaking her head, though, looking between Lucius and Quill. “You asked if you were best friends, with Lucius.”

“Oh yeah!” Aila exclaimed as Nova spoke, “He asked if you were best friends.”

Quill looked at Lucius, who nodded, confirming it. Quill couldn’t stop the smile that was creeping across his face. Best friends? He wouldn’t… he wouldn’t have asked that unless he thought of Quill as his best friend, would he?

“You wanna know what you said?” Aila asked, grinning with that wicked twist to her mouth that Quill had already learnt meant she was in a teasing mood.

“I mean, I think I know what I said,” he replied. He’d said yes, he must have, surely? It might not have been exactly him saying it, but whatever memories of him his body had retained must have known how to answer that. Besides, he was certain Aila was going to tell him what he’d said regardless of what he answered her with.

“You said ‘I guess so’, and it was reeaal silly.” Aila told him, mimicking him as she quoted his reply, and Quill snorted.

Yes, that did sound like him, diffident even with such a straight question. But it was a yes, Lucius must have understood it as such - he smiled at his friend, _his best friend_, again, and Lucius smiled back. Still with that shadow behind it (and Quill definitely needed to get to the bottom of that too), but it was a genuine smile, lighting up his odd-coloured eyes for a moment. Lucius had understood, Quill was sure of it. And perhaps just as important, he hadn’t gone and said anything stupid like Lucius being more than a friend, or Aila would absolutely be teasing him about it.

“Anyway, we did ask some important questions, that’s why you’re still an aarakocra,” Aila continued, gesturing to his feathers.

So he’d been right about that! Well, that was two questions at least, perhaps more if they’d had to ask for more details, more answers as to what his wishes would be. It still left a couple unaccounted for, but presumably they weren’t so important (or revealing) if Lucius’s question had been the first one Nova and Aila thought of… Maybe Lucius had spent one on a “how are you?” again before the other two could stop him? But it didn’t really matter, he knew what the most important one had been now.

“I don’t think it was that silly,” he said, glancing over at Lucius and quickly looking away again, afraid his expression might show too much. “But okay, err, okay,” he continued, trying to work out how to change the conversation now, before anyone started to wonder why he’d asked in the first place.

Aila rolled her eyes at him. “It was quite silly,” she interrupted, then turning on Lucius again with a glare, “It was a silly question!” And maybe she had a point, when the questions the ritual granted were so limited, but Quill couldn’t bring himself to care.

“I thought it was very important to me,” Lucius said quietly, eyes meeting Quill’s, and Quill’s heart skipped a beat. Lucius had meant it as friendship and nothing else, surely, Quill didn’t dare even let himself think he’d meant anything else… But it had mattered to Lucius, mattered enough to spend one of their five questions on, and that meant the world to Quill.


End file.
